The Cat's Pyjamas
by spin84
Summary: In 1985 Minerva and Elphinstone celebrate their third anniversary.


The Cat's Pyjamas

"What do you say to a spot of lunch up in the hills today?"

No reply.

"Elph? Can you hear me? I said what do you think about a picnic? The mist looks like it's lifting, even if it may be rather brisk."

There was still no response from the bathroom and Minerva tutted to herself. When was that wizard going to do something about his hearing. Bless him, but she did so hate raising her voice, especially at home when she didn't have to battle to be heard over the latest school gossip of hormonal teenagers in her classroom.

Placing her teacup to the side - Sundays and Bank Holidays were the only days she allowed him to bring her breakfast in bed - Minerva pushed the covers away and Summoned her tartan dressing gown. She stood at the window taking in the view, watching the sheep on the hillside. When they were first married and looking for a home of their own there had been a choice of two places: a large apartment above Scrivenshaft's on the high street or this smaller - some would say pokey - cottage on the edge of Hogsmeade. It hadn't even been a contest. With a squeeze of her arm by Elphinstone and a nod of her head in reply, both agreed this was the house for them as soon as they had crossed the threshold behind the estate agent.

"Did you say something, love?"

She turned around to see Elphinstone standing in the doorway of the tiny en-suite bathroom, still dressed in his nightshirt and a damp towel in his hands. She raised her eyebrows at his appearance and couldn't prevent the half smile that threatened to break out.

"Oh come here you old fool!"

He did as he was told and shuffled over to her, bumping into the foot of the bed as he did.

"I seem to have misplaced my glasses."

"So I noticed," she replied, still smiling as she used her finger to wipe away some of the shaving lather that was smeared across his cheek. "What am I going to do with you, hmmm? I daresay none of my First Years would present themselves to me looking like this."

"I daresay you are right, my dear. However, none of them have the pleasure of seeing you look so ravishing first thing in the morning. It can do strange things to a wizard you know -"

"Hush now. I'll hear none of that nonsense, anniversary or not." Minerva's words may have seemed harsh but she spoke with a lightness reserved only for her husband and accompanied them with a wink and a brief kiss to the lips.

"I was wondering if you would like a picnic up in the hills today? The weather looks to be lifting and I thought we could make use of the leftovers from last night. That salmon of yours truly was something to behold."

Elphinstone gave her a little bow, accepting her compliment with good grace. He was definitely the better cook out of the two of them, of that they could both agree. "That, my dear, is a marvellous idea. Perhaps a roll in the heather to work up an appetite first?" He quickly took a sidestep to his left to avoid a playful slap of his arm, only to hear the crack of broken glass.

He had found his missing spectacles.

-0-

Lunch had been a jolly good idea and a perfect way to mark the day. The weather had held out for their walk and the clouds had only rolled in as they made their way back down the hillside. A few raindrops soon turned into a torrential downpour that their combined repellent charms could barely contain so they ran the last hundred feet, picking their way through mud and puddles while trying to avoid the slippery rocks. Once they reached solid ground they began to laugh uncontrollably, splashing through Hogsmeade high street until Elphinstone guided Minerva out of the rain and through a mystery doorway into somewhere blissfully warm and dry.

Minerva's glasses had fogged up and she had rain running down her face, but despite this she was still overwhelmed by the unmistakable smell of baking and the cloying aroma of overly-sweet tea and heavily scented candles. "Madam Puddifoot's!" she muttered under her breath. The tea shop had seemingly always played a part in her relationship with Elphinstone, whether it had been his first regretfully turned down proposal, or his second then third attempts, all under the watchful eye of the eponymous proprietor. No doubt she was gleefully observing their arrival even now.

"Damp out, is it dearies?" came the question from behind the counter. It was pointless remarks like that which made the visits here truly excruciating for Minerva, well that and the ridiculous decorations that signalled the relevant season. She was about to give the best sarcastic reply she could muster when Elphinstone effectively silenced her by leading her to a table at the window, ordering tea for two as they passed. He cheerfully pretended to hula dance with a gnome dressed in a grass skirt and playing the ukulele in some gaudy (and given the current weather frankly ridiculous) attempt at celebrating the Great British August Bank Holiday. Minerva gave a sniff of derision and deliberately took a seat looking out of the window at the black skies and heavy raindrops bouncing off the cobbles.

"Let us wait out the storm here; one cup of tea won't do any harm. And I promise I won't do anything embarrassing like propose in front of your students again," he said with a smirk, holding out his arms wide signalling the empty room.

Minerva slowly polished her glasses and affixed them deliberately upon her nose, levelling a stare across the table. After a moment of silent contemplation she spoke.

"I should apologise - " she began quite uncharacteristically.

"No need my dear, I know this is not one of your favourite places to frequent. I should have taken you to the Broomsticks or even straight home."

He was trying to lighten the mood she could tell, but suddenly she felt it very important to get her message across.

"No, I'm not talking about that. I'm sorry we didn't do this sooner, I'm sorry it took me so long to accept -"

"Tea for two and some shortbread sphinxes for my favourite couple, on the house of course. Enjoy." Madam Puddifoot put the tray down with a clatter and slowly wandered back across the room, throwing a glance over her shoulder and winking when she made eye contact with Minerva.

Sighing, Minerva turned back to her husband and began to pour out their tea. "What I was trying to say Elph is that I made a mistake - three in fact. I was acting on a promise made more than thirty years ago, a promise to myself. When I think of the opportunities missed… I should have listened to Albus; I should have -"

Elphinstone reached across the table and put down the teapot, steadying her hand. "Minerva my dearest, I am simply grateful for our time together - all that we have enjoyed so far and all that is to come. The past three years have been wonderful, but by Merlin I rather enjoyed the thrill of the chase!"

Minerva couldn't help but smile through her malaise as he gave her hand a little squeeze before taking a piece of shortbread.

"Mmhmm, these are good," he said around a mouthful of biscuit crumbs. "You really should try one."

In spite of herself she took one, and in spite of herself she actually rather liked it.

-0-

"Damn and blast!"

"Oh dear, not another goal for the Pride is it? What's the score now?"

Despite the _WWN_ commentary of the quidditch local derby burbling in the background, Elphinstone hadn't really been following the match. Instead, he had been reading his new book _'The Viciously Venomous Vegetables of Venezuela (And Other Edible Roots of South America)'_ and was mentally planning how to rearrange his small greenhouse in order to fit in all the new potential plants he would be purchasing.

"120-40. The Magpies don't even seem to be trying since MacKenzie was ruled out for the season. Why that silly girl was flying near muggle electricity pylons in the first place is beyond me. Brilliant Chaser for Hufflepuff but not an ounce of common sense, I could have told you that ten years ago!"

Elphinstone nodded silently in agreement - not because he knew the lass, but because this was not the first time Minerva had stated her opinion on the Montrose Magpies captain. Looking up he noticed dusk was falling and with a wave of his hand he lit the lamps. Minerva was notorious for squinting over her needlepoint, no matter how many candles he left on her side table. He stretched and cricked his neck; these were the evenings he loved. They had shared a wonderful meal and together had almost polished off a bottle of goblin-made wine. There was no point in keeping the dregs he told himself, so he sent the bottle bobbing over to refill Minerva's glass and then his before going back to his book.

He supposed he must have dozed off at some point, for he almost fell off the settee when someone assaulted his ears with a whoop and enthusiastic applause. He blinked a few times, his eyes adjusting to the dim light and the sight of Minerva McGonagall jumping in the air.

"We won! Jameson caught the snitch! _We only went and bloody won, Elph!_ "

Her girlish giggle sent a thrill up his spine and he suddenly found himself being pulled up into her arms and thoroughly kissed. If only he could fix it for the Magpies to win for the rest of eternity, his life would be set.

"Time for bed I think," Minerva said once she released him from her clutches. A glance at the clock told him it was almost midnight. Such a shame, no doubt it was too late for a little anniversary rough and tumble. Minerva would have an early start at the castle in the morning, what with the students arriving for a new school year in a matter of days -

"Joining me?"

\- Or perhaps not! Elphinstone hurried to turn off the lamps and used their favourite _Locomotor_ spell to pack up her needlework and sewing bag and send them marching safely away to the cupboard. He set the wards for the night and quickly trotted up the stairs after his wife.

Minerva was in the bathroom when he arrived, so he set about changing and turning down their bed. Perching on the edge of the mattress, he couldn't resist stroking the sheets on her side. He loved her, completely and utterly, including her passionate side that by definition was always difficult to read. He was the lucky one who got to see it more often than most - especially for the good, here in their bed - but this was mirrored by being the only place and time that his darling Minerva could also appear vulnerable and he proudly considered it his responsibility to protect, reassure and to guide her. Although thinking about it he supposed everyone must have an air of vulnerability when dressed merely in their night things, even the great Albus Dumbledore. Now that was an image he wished he hadn't conjured and he gave a little shudder - half in disgust, half amusement.

"What's so funny?"

He turned around to see Minerva in her soft flannelette nightgown peering quizzically at him. He held out a hand but she ignored it and walked over to her side, pulling the covers up to her chin. Taking the hint, he stood up with a groan of his aching bones after their long walk and made to go and brush his teeth.

"I was just thinking of that Headmaster of yours and what he wears to bed."

" _I beg your pardon?_ You are a strange wizard Mr. Urquhart, very strange. What on earth prompted that train of thought dare I ask?"

He shrugged his shoulders and went about his business of brushing his teeth.

"Purple I would wager," she called through the open door.

Elphinstone rinsed out his mouth and padded back through into the bedroom. It was rather chilly now and he all but leapt into bed, snuggling down and savouring the warmth. "What's purple my love?"

"Dumbledore's pyjamas. Purple and no doubt enchanted to have phoenixes flying all over them too. An absolute eyesore for anyone trying to sleep in his quarters."

"I'm sure Alastor remembers to take out that new eye of his before they fall into bed together."

"Now, now, we know nothing of the sort."

"You forget I still have friends at the Ministry. Gossip is still the major currency in those hallowed halls. Apparently it all started during these trials; two war heroes working long hours late into the night… You know how these things are."

"I don't wish to hear it," she snapped. "Even if it is true Albus deserves some comfort in his life and I won't hear a word against him, least of all from you. You should be grateful to him, if he hadn't made me come to my senses I wouldn't be in your bed right now!"

As if to emphasise her point Minerva rolled over, turning her back to him and silently extinguished the candles. Well this wasn't how he had envisioned their anniversary ending, and after such a lovely day together too. He sighed and stared up at the black ceiling.

"I have to ask, why did you keep coming back for me?" Her voice was small and muffled, she must have been speaking into her pillow.

It wasn't the first time she had asked that question and probably wouldn't be the last. And as usual, he replied with a question of his own.

"Why did you accept me that fourth time?"

She didn't answer immediately as he knew she wouldn't, but hesitantly, she found his hand. Taking it as a sign of peace, Elphinstone curled up behind her and brought their joined hands to rest over her abdomen.

"I love you," he breathed against her neck. "Madly," he kissed her at the same point, "passionately," another kiss, "eternally."

She turned in his arms and he could just make out her smile before she whispered.

"Happy anniversary, Elph. Here's to many, many more."

His eyes fluttered closed as he felt her hands travel under his nightshirt.

Thank Merlin he didn't wear those ridiculous, restrictive muggle contraptions that were pyjamas.

-0-

 ** _Author's note:_** _I was struggling for a title for this little mindless wandering and then I wrote that last line and couldn't see past it, even if doesn't have any real meaning! Sorry about that._


End file.
